Day Five - Communication and Consideration

I'm pretty annoyed today. It's the weekend, I know, and there's always a different atmosphere to the world somehow! The cliffs where I take my walks are always different at weekends. More people, a different type of people; families spending quality time together, friends together for weekends etc. I went for my walk today and it was the same as any weekend. In fact you'd think it was a fucking Bank Holiday! Social Distancing? A joke. Groups of people strolling along brushing against other groups of people strolling along. I had to frequently walk on the uneven grass, avoiding dog poo, while they enjoyed the paths. And joggers?! Wow. They aren't going let any little killer virus impact on their lives. If I hadn't moved out of the way I think they have mown me down! Selfish. I wish they'd think beyond their own selves and consider others, we all want to stay fit. Don't get me wrong I understand the fitness bug. I walk the route I used to jog when my body served me better. I know the endorphin rush. I totally get it. But in all my time as a jogger I never once, pandemic or not, behaved as if the world was my right of way. I deferred to everyone else. I was considerate. So although I had a good walk I came home fearful that, certainly where I'm living, it's going to be an uphill struggle to beat this thing.

There were family groups up there. And that led me to wonder about social distancing and family life. Today the kids were on bikes and scooters, flying kites, enjoying the outside and getting some physical exercise which is wonderful. But social distancing? Not a chance. They seemed oblivious, and their parents weren't bothered either. However it's all very well for me to moan and complain but I need to give some thought as to how I would manage social distancing if I were still parenting. I realise it can't be easy. Much must depend on the age of the children and how much they understand of the situation without frightening them.  As a parent you cannot socially distance yourself from your kids!  I guess you have to try and view the whole family unit as one body and distance the whole unit. Not easy. You might perhaps search for a clear space to cycle and scoot and kick balls rather than choose the most crowed areas. Again, not easy. But none of this is easy, is it? Are we really up to the challenge? Is our society so cosseted now that anything hard is rejected by most?

Yet again I've spent the rest of the day reading and writing mostly. I'm feeling a bit guilty because there are other things that need doing. I did try to do some stuff in the garden but after about ten minutes my spine complained bitterly and I had to stop or I'd have been in real trouble. In fact I had to come in and do my physio. Very frustrating as, apart from the wind it has been a beautiful day.

Texts, WhatsApp messages and emails have been in abundance as people strive to stay in contact. I'm trying to give time and consideration to all, more so than normal because I think people are unsure how to deal with the lack of social interaction and communication is a form of reassurance even if it's only digital. I had a long phone call with a friend who has ticked me off for not keeping up with the news. But I find myself less anxious if I avoid it. Another friend who has a son working in a supermarket has offered to get hold of anything I might run short of. That is a relief but it also makes me feel a bit guilty when I know others might be struggling to get hold of essentials. But I am hopeful  that the shopping situation will even out and become more stable. I think social media has shamed a lot of people who panic bought and stock piled. I also think people may have calmed down a little after their initial fears of 'starving'. Possibly the stores and manufacturers have got their act together too. We'll see. I am going to refrain from going anywhere near a shop until I really have to.

The neighbour I mentioned in Day Three has just come home from hospital. I am shocked. She only had the op on Thursday. When my Mum had her hip replacement she was in for several days. I guess that's another impact of COVID-19  - freeing up beds for virus patients. I'm in a quandary because I don't want to break my social distancing regime but I feel as a decent human being I should go round and see if they need any help. But supposing I am carrying the virus? I could be. I hope not. But if I was and I passed it on to either of them the results could be tragic. 

I'm still amazed that I can find stuff to write about. I keep thinking I won't do an entry today then something occurs to me and.........this is the result! I don't even know if anyone is reading any of this. But it doesn't matter because it's something I feel I need to do. When all this is 'over' and I'm aware it may never be over it might be interesting to see if my mental and emotional state has been compromised by the social distances. I already feel much more isolated than usual.