Day Eighty-One - Who Switched the Sun Off?

Grey and gloomy day today. There's been the odd patch of sunlight but on the whole it's been very dull and rain has been threatening. Matches my mood really. Because it's just as if someone switched the sun off. Both indoors and out, metaphorically speaking. Funny, it seems that with the coronavirus lockdown life changed irrevocably but life can change in lots of other ways as well. I fear that life is changing now forever and I will have naught but my memories to cling to. Perhaps it's just another of the burdens of ageing. Perhaps it's just the fact that life is in perpetual flux. Nothing stays the same forever. But I feel unnerved and anxious.

I went for my walk this morning and I felt quite chilly because I was wearing my T-shirt. I'll check the temperature tomorrow but I may even have to take the sweatshirt out again. My thumbs up lady still hasn't put in an appearance for the whole of the week. She does make me very worried. I've seen all my other regulars. I'm actually walking further but in slightly quicker time which is amazing to me.

I cleaned the bathroom today. It has to be done very thoroughly now, not that it wasn't clean or thorough before but it's a major obsession now because if anybody comes to spend time in the garden, socially distanced, according to the government they are allowed to come inside and use the toilet. So I must make sure it's all sanitised all the time.

My sister phoned me today. That's quite unusual because we normally exchange text messages. When I see her name come up on the phone I tend to be worried as I think there must be something wrong. She phoned  just to check that I was doing okay. She was worried that I thought less of her for not having come down to see me. But I don't at all. I tried to reassure her. I don't think it's the right thing for her to come down here. She seems worried that she might be carrying the virus and she would never forgive herself if she brought it down here. I think part of that is the paranoia of living in London.

We had an update on Auntie Pat. Apparently she had another fall. But she didn't injure herself this time. Evidently she tried to get up out of a chair by herself but is struggling with this at the moment. She's lost some weight and her speech has deteriorated a little.The only good thing to be read from that is that she is out of bed and in a chair. She is still not able to talk on the phone.

My brother phoned yesterday. He's been taking advantage of the relaxed lockdown. He went to visit his good friend about a half hours drive away and sat in the garden and had some lunch. However he hasn't dared tell his wife who would be cross with him for mixing with somebody else. But as my brother is incapable of not telling the truth he will end up telling her I know! He is one of the most open and honest people you'll ever meet. 

Although it was supposed to be today the nurse from the surgery phoned yesterday for my hypertension review. We had a brief chat. And I was able to give her the readings from my blood pressure monitor. And I explained that it was probably a little higher than normal because I've been upset. And I told her why and I could tell from her tone of voice that it didn't sound good. But she sounded very pleasant and seems very positive and warm about the things I was telling her about my exercise and my diet et cetera.

In wider news - France has cancelled the Bastille day parade. Alok Sharma, who is Secretary of State for Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy, has fallen ill with suspected coronavirus. He spent 45 minutes with the Prime Minister and Chancellor the day before he fell ill  giving rise to concerns that both Johnson and Sunak will have to self isolate. Don't forget Boris Johnson had the virus and was even hospitalised in the ICU. Ergo, if he is required to self isolate then there can be no confidence that having had the virus once you cannot get it again? 

The fallout from the dreadful murder of George Floyd by Minneapolis policemen continues. With protests and requests for governments to take action. The #BlackLivesMatter is being used everywhere at the moment. It's as if it's superseded news about the virus. Sometimes I think people confuse prejudice and racism. I think you can be racist without being prejudiced. You know how you get people who say some of my best friends are black, that's racist. Shouldn't matter what colour your friends are. But it's not prejudice, I don't think. What happened to George Floyd was prejudice, to the extreme. RIP, poor man.