All the people I wave at were walking this morning. It's curious. I don't know any of these people. But when they're not there for one or more days I start to worry and I hope that they're okay. So there's always a mild relief when they're all present and correct. I wonder if they think the same about me?
I was having an interesting exchange yesterday with a friend of mine. She is also a healthcare professional and looks after my feet. She's going to see what the government say next week with regard to getting back to work. She hopes to start by seeing one patient a day and build up gradually. When I first read it I was really excited and thought great, I can't wait to get my feet sorted out! But then I started to fret a bit. I've had no one in my home for weeks now. I've not been near another person for weeks. I'm not sure how I feel. In fact she's been insured to treat people throughout the pandemic but she made an informed choice from the government guidelines and hasn't worked throughout the whole lockdown. She has patients in dire need and if treatment is delayed much longer they might have to seek further medical treatment. Something else interesting that she said with regard to getting ourselves back to "normal" when the lockdown is eased is that so many of us have been frightened 'into believing that this invisible bogeyman is going to get us'. And that is so true. Fear has made us impotent.
Now here's something a little more light hearted. Are you up to date with lockdown lingo?
*Coronacoaster*
The ups and downs of your mood during the pandemic. You’re loving lockdown one minute but suddenly weepy with anxiety the next. It truly is “an emotional corona coaster”.
*Quarantinis*
Experimental cocktails mixed from whatever random ingredients you have left in the house. The boozy equivalent of a store cupboard supper. Southern Comfort and Ribena quarantini with a glacé cherry garnish, anyone? These are sipped at “locktail hour”, ie. wine o’clock during lockdown, which seems to be creeping earlier with each passing week.
*Blue Skype thinking*
A work brainstorming session which takes place over a videoconferencing app. Such meetings might also be termed a “Zoomposium”. Naturally, they are to be avoided if at all possible.
*Le Creuset wrist*
It’s the new “avocado hand” - an aching arm after taking one’s best saucepan outside to bang during the weekly ‘Clap For Carers.’ It might be heavy but you’re keen to impress the neighbours with your high-quality kitchenware.
*Coronials*
As opposed to millennials, this refers to the future generation of babies conceived or born during coronavirus quarantine. They might also become known as “Generation C” or, more spookily, “Children of the Quarn”.
*Furlough Merlot*
Wine consumed in an attempt to relieve the frustration of not working. Also known as “bored-eaux” or “cabernet tedium”.
*Coronadose*
An overdose of bad news from consuming too much media during a time of crisis. Can result in a panicdemic.
*The Elephant in the Zoom*
The glaring issue during a videoconferencing call that nobody feels able to mention. E.g. one participant has dramatically put on weight, suddenly sprouted terrible facial hair or has a worryingly messy house visible in the background.
*Quentin Quarantino*
An attention-seeker using their time in lockdown to make amateur films which they’re convinced are funnier and cleverer than they actually are.
*Covidiot* or *Wuhan-ker*
One who ignores public health advice or behaves with reckless disregard for the safety of others can be said to display “covidiocy” or be “covidiotic”. Also called a “lockclown” or even a “Wuhan-ker”.
*Goutbreak*
The sudden fear that you’ve consumed so much wine, cheese, home-made cake and Easter chocolate in lockdown that your ankles are swelling up like a medieval king’s.
*Antisocial distancing*
Using health precautions as an excuse for snubbing neighbours and generally ignoring people you find irritating.
*Coughin’ dodger*
Someone so alarmed by an innocuous splutter or throat-clear that they back away in terror.
*Mask-ara*
Extra make-up applied to "make one's eyes pop" before venturing out in public wearing a face mask.
*Covid-10*
The 10lbs in weight that we’re all gaining from comfort-eating and comfort-drinking. Also known as “fattening the curve".
I haven't heard about Auntie Pat since Friday. She is still in isolation. She is eating soft food and her surgery is healing well. She is on medication for a urinary infection and is still very frail. She is sleeping most of the time. It's not dreadful news but it isn't great either.
The bunting I referred to in an earlier post is all about V.E. Day next Friday NOT clapping for carers as I originally thought.Duh. I had a message from a friend down the road telling me they had put out bunting and were having parties in their front gardens on V.E. Day. That sounds fun. Not that anyone in my little enclave will do anything. I can see bunting in the road opposite. So my guess they'll all be out in force. I think it will just make me feel more alone than ever.
I wrote another poem today. I do find reading and writing are what keep me balanced when I start to wobble.
The Lockdown Boogie
It’s a
Lockdown
Shakedown
Comedown
Letdown
With a
Showdown
Clampdown
Closedown
Crackdown
I’m a
Breakdown
Lowdown
Meltdown
Putdown
Feel a
Bringdown
Knockdown
Meltdown
Cooldown
So I’ll
Dressdown
Cutdown
Talkdown
Countdown
To a
Sundown
Hoedown
Rubdown
Markdown
All I want
Eiderdown.
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